Gacha Addict in a Matriarchal World
Chapter 31: Tis But A Dream

Lemon and Apple entered the alleyway in a strange posture, somewhere between annoying and sleazy, with their heads held high and their upper bodies swaying.

“Heh?”

“Tsk. New faces.”

The tough-looking women, huddled together smoking, clicked their tongues upon spotting their fellow tradespeople. However, they soon noticed Lemon and Apple’s ears and were bewildered.

“Elves? Why would elves be…”

“You dumb bitch! Why do you think elves would come all the way to a back alley like this to find folks like us!”

As if realizing something, one of them widened her eyes, stamped out her cigarette, and asked, “Where are you folks from?”

Hmm. A reasonable reaction. No matter how much Lemon and Apple might look like third-rate thugs, an elf was still an elf. Moreover, elves were known for being a race without petty criminals, the reason being that crime doesn’t pay.

In other words, they must have concluded that behind the seemingly trivial Lemon and Apple was a formidable big shot. Quick thinking. Well, they wouldn’t have survived otherwise.

My admiration for their quick shift in stance was short-lived. The two elves, who were even less than local thugs, giggled and puffed out their flat chests.

“Hehe. Curious who sent us?”

“Don’t be shocked. They’re a ruthless butcher and a debt collector who’d chase you to the ends of hell to claim what’s owed to them.”

“Jonah, that fearsome name refers to this person right here!”

“Everyone bows their heads to him!”

……?

What kind of nonsense was that?

Suddenly, Lemon and Apple pointed to where I was hiding. I should have realized when they rushed over there, making a ruckus….

The thugs, locking eyes with me, momentarily wore stupefied expressions.

Right. I understand. I, too, would have made that face if an uwu middle school girl appeared, claiming they were a national-level gang boss.

But thanks to the thugs being more surprised than me, I was able to regain my composure quickly.

Originally, Lemon and Apple were supposed to pick a fight, and I planned to come in and pretend to break it up during their argument, then sneak into their pockets. No matter how thuggish, they wouldn’t just beat up a pretty boy who came to stop the fight. Then it would have been an easy, simple, and quick pickpocketing formula complete….

“Argh! I don’t care anymore! Just die…!”

If I’ve already been caught, the only remaining method was to strike first to win.

For that reason, I charged at the head of the thugs at the very front who questioned us.

“Huh…?”

I threw a noose made of the sturdy rope I had fashioned yesterday towards her, who still hadn’t come to her senses.

She tried to take off the noose, sensing that it was dangerous…

“It’s too late!”

In an instant, I traversed the narrow alley, climbed onto the shoulders of the thug leader, tightly wrapped the noose around her neck, and strangled her.

“Gurk….”

While she was trying to untangle the rope around her neck, I struck the back of her head with the handle of the dagger.

Phuck!

Unfortunately, unlike in the movies, she didn’t pass out from one blow, so I kept hitting her until she did.

Phuck! Phuck! Phuck!

“Argh! Gurk! Geuk.”

Maybe it was a lucky shot. Trembling, the leader lady’s eyes rolled back, and she collapsed.

Towards the other thugs, who had all frozen from what happened in the blink of an eye, I flipped them off.

“You guys’ territory is done for! From now on, this place is under the control of Sir Jonah!”

Those who don’t agree, come at me!

The labyrinth city was relatively safe for a place teeming with tough adventurers. The reason was simple. The real scary ones were either holed up in the labyrinth or were the corporate mafia types who had no interest in petty crimes.

Of course, there were the occasional serial killers, drug dealers, or professional human traffickers…. But those usually had their heads caved in by a guild’s subjugation request or got done in by the real big shots for bothering their markets before long.

The Twin Dagger Clan that kidnapped me was just like that. They were too passionate about human trafficking and ended up getting caught by the guild.

Anyway, given such circumstances, unless you deliberately venture deep into the dark parts, there really weren’t many dangerous folks around. That had been why I used to pickpocket around the city before I met Lydia.

But even thugs who relied on extorting protection money from orphans and beggars as their main income because they were too scared of messing with legitimate businesses, would dine and dash at street stalls, and would enact bloody revenge (no one dies) when their lackeys come to them beaten up, they would still be stronger than me.

It wasn’t without reason that I thought of using Lemon and Apple. It was because I wasn’t confident with direct confrontation. That had been the case…

“Pl-please spare us, and we will swear loyalty to you!”

“……?”

I looked down at the five or six thugs kneeling before me. Clothes that stuck tightly to their bodies, the smell of alcohol and cigarettes emanating from their entire beings, and faces that, though scarred and rugged by the standards of the continent, didn’t look too bad in my eyes.

The thugs that I considered so fearsome just months ago were now bowing down in front of me. And this wasn’t even the first time. This was already the third group.

How had it come to this…?

Lemon and Apple continued to reveal my location stupidly, and in a moment of panic, I subdued the strongest-looking one first. Then, when the rest of the gang immediately surrendered, I just took their wallets and let them go. Maybe that was the problem.

At first, those who had been so scared of me visibly relaxed, and then they began following me around. Even if I told them to scram, they would only stay at a distance for a short while but never stop their persistent following.

Feeling it was somewhat pointless to just leave things as they were, I asked if there were any decent targets around to fleece, and with a gleeful expression, I would be guided to another alley.

…And just like Lemon and Apple had done, they introduced me with confidence.

Crazy women.

Perhaps because I had lackeys (they weren’t) with me, but the already hostile atmosphere reached its peak, and we were attacked first… But we ended up winning the fight.

My experience from the labyrinth, especially the experience of facing the Horn Rabbits, helped a lot. If I could handle that swift creature’s speed, how could the punches of these pathetic thugs, who hadn’t even become proper adventurers, reach me?

The ones who seemed to be the leader charged at me first but ended up punching empty air before being subdued. As soon as their leader was easily captured, the underlings surrendered without hesitation. I took all their wallets and let them go once again, but they started to follow me around just like the others.

I was so baffled that even when I asked why they were doing this, they just clung on persistently, asking to be accepted as my subordinate, so I got a bit tired of it and sent them over to Lemon and Apple.

Thus, the number of my lackeys (seriously, they’re not) doubled.

Half-giving up, I asked for the next target, hoping to resolve things quietly this time…

But Lemon and Apple, not wanting to be outdone by the newcomers, rushed out and shouted aloud before I could stop them. That I wanted this to be resolved quietly, so they should do as told.

And that led us to now.

These ones didn’t even think about fighting me; they just immediately knelt down.

…Why was it that I remembered the whole process, but I still didn’t understand how it ended up like this?

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As I was tilting my head in confusion, Lemon and Apple, standing beside me, started to scold them loudly.

“How dare you! Who do you even think Sir Jonah is?!”

“Do you think you can survive with such empty-handed loyalty?”

Shouting this, the twins rubbed their index and thumb together. It was a demand so blatant that it seemed ridiculous, but perhaps this was exactly the kind of thing that worked, as the thugs who had been shivering in fear suddenly widened their eyes.

They hurriedly started rummaging through their pockets. Polite enough to take out their wallets and place them on the ground, Lemon and Apple collected them all and handed them to me.

“Hmm….”

I pretended to be displeased as I took the wallets. Of course, it’s not like there was a lot of money in them. Even the thickest wallet from the leader barely contained a little more than 2 silver.

Still, after collecting everything, it seemed like they had about four silver. Including what we extorted from the previous groups, it all added up to nearly 13 silver.

Originally, the plan was to sneak a wallet or two from those quarreling with Lemon and Apple, so I thought that earning 2~3 silvers would be a big haul…

But my plan has changed. The benefits now outweighed my unease. Abandoning my hesitation, I nodded.

“Good. That’s enough. You can stand up now.”

“Be grateful for Sir Jonah’s generosity!”

“Now you are also part of our family!”

“Thank you… Thank you….”

Lemon and Apple proudly declared them to join us, and the third boss seemed genuinely relieved.

I poked the sides of the twin elves as I watched the thugs stagger to their feet.

“Heut.”

“Hnngh….”

“Stop making weird noises, and come talk with me for a second. I have something to discuss.”

“What is it? If you have something to discuss… do you need to go to the bathroom?”

“Lemon. Men don’t go to the bathroom.”

“What’s that nonsense? Why would I call you just to go to the bathroom? And Apple Pay. Even men go to the bathroom, you know?”

Lemon just blinked dumbly as if she was truly clueless, and Apple slumped down like the world had just ended.

Sighing deeply at the sight, I pointed behind us to the thugs… no, now my lackeys, welcoming the newcomers.

“What’s with them? Why do they act as if it’s natural to become my subordinates?”

“Huh? Weren’t you planning to take over this area?”

“Did you not know what you were getting into? This is surprising in its own way.”

“No, I wasn’t trying to do this. I was just going to swipe their wallets and run. Anyway, I really don’t understand, so hurry up and explain.”

Lemon and Apple looked at each other and nodded.

“It’s simple. Jonah tried to subdue them while inflicting the least amount of harm.”

“You didn’t even try to kill or cripple them. In this industry, that’s how you tell someone to join you.”

“But what if you just talk…no, of course, they’re out here ripping off kids instead of going to the labyrinth because talking it out doesn’t work.”

“There’s another reason for that as well. Jonah is young and cute, right?”

“How would the others consider those who got completely beaten by Jonah? Those around them would ignore them.”

“…So their mindset is ‘since I’ve already lost, let all the other bitches get screwed over too’?”

“It’s similar but a bit different.”

“If everyone gets beaten by Jonah, they aren’t the only ones that will be embarrassed. It’s just that Jonah was strong.”

“…….”

“Above all, in this field, if there’s someone who can fight as well as Jonah, you absolutely have to cling to them.”

“Or never get involved again and just live a decent life.”

“They’re too faithful to the law of the jungle…”

That was the reason?

I shook my head in disbelief and asked, “Aren’t you two ashamed to submit to a young guy like me?”

“What are you talking about? It’s exciting.”

“Serving a female boss is normal, but serving a male boss is hot.”

“…Ah.”

I understood. Loli boss? Hell yeah.

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